Siri really hates my voice.
As someone who spent a good deal of time on stage growing up, that hurts just a bit. Enunciating my words was drilled in me, and still Siri has no idea what I am saying most of the time.
Turns out if I pretend I am british, and talk to Siri in a terrible midwesterner meets british “accent” it understands me.
Unless I am completely lost, with no where to pull over so I can type in an address, two hours late for a Women’s retreat, and sobbing.
“Take *gasp* meeee *sob* toooo *sniffle* 2 *gasp* 5 *sniffle* *sob* 4…”
Siri did not have a chance.
But, back to being two hours late to a women’s retreat I was desperately anxious to get to.
It was the first woman’s function I was getting to go to with our new church here in Maryland. I had met many of the ladies, but chatting after church isn’t the best way to get to know people so I was really looking forward to it. I was also quite anxious.
While they are always worth it, going somewhere I don’t really know anyone is a bit challenging for this socially awkward introvert.
Add in my need to take my food with me wherever I go thanks to egg and nut allergies in addition to being on GAPS, and it becomes a bit more stressful. Once again, while it is silly, I feel a quite awkward and a bit left out digging out leftover containers to eat from among others enjoying shared foods.
I settled on this chicken salad, with a mustard dressing, to take for lunch, as it seemed fairly normal and mini-woman’s retreat-ish.
I have always loved chicken salads, but while I know how to make egg free mayonnaise, it is not my favorite thing to do. So, I came up with a date and mustard dressing that is as creamy as a mayonnaise based dressing without needing the extra step of making mayonnaise.
The dates give it body and a bit of sweetness, the mustard helps to emulisify everything, and as someone who might be a mustard jedi I love the strong mustard taste of it. Add in some vegetables and herbs for color and texture, and it is a quite solid chicken salad.
Chicken salad made, I got dressed, and even felt brave enough to wear the crazier side of my reversible wrap pants and a far from traditional shirt. Which Christopher informed me, as I was leaving, made me look just like a pirate. Bye bye confidence… I mean family… I am out the door.
I get there, but no one else was. Out comes my trusty phone, that hates my accent, and I see it started at 10 not 11. Oh, and the community center was one I had not heard of on the other side of town not the community center right by my house that belongs to the church.
Ooops. I knew I should have quadruple checked the location and time.
Now just to find the new place, with my trusty phone maps.
Apple maps took me to an apartment complex, google maps took me to the middle of the a road, and the nice jogger (who thankfully was able to understand my accent and was not scared by my pirate costume) directed me to the community center… which ended up also not being the one I needed to go to.
I was in tears after this and tried to get Siri to take me home, but like I said driving + crying + not using a british accent means Siri had no idea where to direct me.
That ended up being the deciding factor I was going to TRY AGAIN! I called Mark, who called our pastor, then called me back. 15 minutes in the wrong direction, and with more tears then I care to admit I finally knew where I was going.
I am glad I was able to go, even of only to half of it! I needed a bit of a break and Christian fellowship with new friends!
- For the dressing:
- 3 tablespoons prepared mustard
- 6 medjool dates
- ½ cup white balsamic vinegar
- ¾ teaspoon salt
- ¼ cup water
- 1½ teaspoon garlic powder
- ⅛ teaspoon allspice
- ¼ teaspoon thyme
- ⅛ teaspoon cinnamon
- ¼ teaspoon cayenne
- ½ cup avocado or refined olive oil
- For the salad and serving:
- 4 8 oz chicken breasts
- 1½ teaspoon salt
- 2 teaspoons avocado oil or melted ghee
- 2 red bell peppers, diced
- 2 stalks celery, diced
- ¼ cup chopped parsley
- 2 green onions, sliced
- Cucumber slices, or crackers to serve with it. Or bread of choice, tomato slices, and lettuce for sandwiches.
- Preheat a grill pan until smoking hot over high heat. Slice the chicken breast in half crosswise so you have two thin chicken breasts. Salt the chicken breasts and coat with the oil. Doing 4 pieces at a time grill. Mine cooked very quickly, getting good char marks after 30 seconds so I rotated them, did another 30 seconds then flipped and repeated on the other side. Turn the heat down if needed to keep from burning to finish cook through. Repeat with the other chicken breasts.
- Note: cooking until just cooked through in a medium heat skillet also works, just be careful to not overcook as it will then be dry.
- Set aside.
- To make the dressing put the dates, vinegar, and water into a powerful blender. Blend until smooth. Blend in the seasonings and mustard, followed by slowly drizzling in the oil while blending.
- Once cool, chop the chicken breats and toss with the prepared vegetables. Dress and serve with cucumber slices or crackers, or on bread.
If you make this, I would love if you shared on instagram and tagged #worthcooking so I can see.
A photo posted by Debra Worth (@worthcooking) on